ARKCODEX
Meditations
1The substance of the universe is yielding and pliable. The reason that governs it has no cause within itself for doing harm. It holds no malice. It does nothing wrong. Nothing is injured by it. All things come into being and reach their end according to it.
2Do not let it matter whether you do what is right while freezing or warm. Whether drowsy or well-rested. Whether criticized or praised. Whether dying or doing something else. For dying is also one of the acts of life. So here too it is enough to make good use of the present moment.
3Look inward. Let nothing escape you—neither the true nature of a thing nor its worth.
4Everything in the physical world will change with incredible speed. Either it will evaporate like smoke, if matter is unified. Or it will scatter into fragments.
5The ruling reason knows its own condition. It knows what it does. It knows the material it works upon.
6The best revenge is not to become like your enemy.
7Find your one delight and rest in this alone. Moving from one act of service to another. Keeping God always in mind.
8The ruling faculty is that which rouses itself and directs itself. It makes itself into whatever it wishes to be. It makes everything that happens appear to itself however it chooses.
9Everything unfolds according to the nature of the whole. There is no other nature that could govern it. Not one surrounding it from outside. Not one contained within. Not one hanging apart.
10Either there is chaos, entanglement, and dispersion. Or there is unity, order, and providence. If the former, why do I even wish to linger in this random compound and confusion? Why should I care about anything except how I might eventually become earth? Why should I be troubled at all? Dispersion will come upon me regardless of what I do. But if the latter, I revere. I stand firm. I trust in the one who governs all.
11When circumstances force you into turmoil, return quickly to yourself. Do not lose your rhythm longer than necessary. You will master your inner harmony by continually returning to it.
12If you had both a stepmother and a mother, you would attend to the stepmother. Yet you would keep returning to your mother. That is what the court and philosophy are to you now. Come back here often. Find your rest in philosophy. She is the reason life at court seems bearable. She is the reason you remain bearable while there.
13Consider how it helps to form clear impressions of fine foods and delicacies. This is the corpse of a fish. This is the corpse of a bird or pig. Falernian wine is merely grape juice. The purple-bordered toga is sheep's hair dipped in shellfish blood. Sexual intercourse is the rubbing of organs and the spasmodic release of mucus. Impressions like these cut through to the things themselves. They pass straight through appearances and let you see what they truly are. You must do this throughout your whole life. When things seem most worthy of admiration, strip them bare. See their cheapness. Tear away the fine story that makes them seem grand. Vanity is a powerful deceiver. When you think you are most engaged in serious matters, that is when it bewitches you most. Consider what Crates said about Xenocrates himself.
14Most things the crowd admires fall into the lowest category. They are held together merely by physical structure or natural growth. Stones. Wood. Fig trees. Vines. Olive groves. Those with slightly more refinement admire things with animal souls. Flocks and herds. Those who think themselves more cultivated still admire things with rational souls. Yet not the universal kind. Only souls that possess some craft or clever skill. Or they simply prize owning a multitude of slaves. But the one who honors the rational soul in its universal and social nature pays no attention to these other things. Above all else, he preserves his own soul in its rational and communal character. He keeps it moving in that direction. And he works alongside his fellow human beings toward this same end.
15Some things rush toward becoming. Others rush toward having been. And even as something comes into being, part of it has already vanished. Streams of change renew the world without end. Just as time's ceaseless flow makes eternity forever new. In this river, what could you value among the things racing past? You cannot stand on any of them. It is like falling in love with a sparrow flying by. Already it has vanished from sight. Life itself is like this. Like vapor rising from blood. Like breath drawn from the air. For what it means to inhale once and exhale—which we do moment by moment—that is what it means to surrender the whole power of breathing. You gained it when you were born yesterday or the day before. You return it now to where you first drew it in.
16Neither breathing through pores like plants is worthy of honor. Nor breathing air like cattle and wild beasts. Nor receiving impressions through the senses. Nor being jerked about by impulse like a puppet. Nor herding together. Nor eating. For that is no different from expelling the waste of food. What then is worthy of honor? Being applauded? No. Then not being applauded by tongues either. For the praises of the crowd are just a clapping of tongues. So you have let go of petty fame as well. What remains that is worthy of honor? I say it is this: to move and to be restrained according to your own nature. This is what all training and every craft aims toward. Every craft has this goal: that what is made should be fit for the work it was made to do. The gardener seeks this. The keeper of the vineyard seeks this. The horse trainer seeks this. The one who cares for the dog seeks this. And what do education and teaching strive toward? Here then is what is truly worthy of honor. If you have this, you will not chase after other things. Will you not stop honoring so many other things? If you do not, you will never be free. Never self-sufficient. Never at peace. You will be forced to envy. Forced to feel jealousy. Forced to suspect those who can take these things away. Forced to plot against those who have what you prize. You will be thrown into turmoil if you lack any of these things. And you will find yourself blaming the gods. But reverence for your own mind and respect for yourself will make you pleasing to yourself. It will make you fit for life among others. It will bring you into harmony with the gods. You will praise whatever they distribute and ordain.
17The elements move up, down, and around in cycles. But the motion of virtue follows none of these paths. It is something more divine. It advances along a road hard to trace. Yet it finds its way.
18Consider what people do. They refuse to praise those living alongside them in their own time. Yet they place great value on being praised by future generations. People they have never seen and never will see. This is like being upset that those who lived before you did not speak well of you either.
19Don't assume that what is difficult for you is impossible for anyone. If something is possible and natural for a human being, consider it within your reach as well.
20In the gymnasium, someone scratches you with his nails. He butts you with his head and leaves a wound. But you do not protest. You do not take offense. You do not suspect him afterward of plotting against you. Yet you do stay on your guard. Not as against an enemy. Not with suspicion. But with a friendly avoidance. Let the same happen in the rest of life. Let us overlook much from those who are, so to speak, our sparring partners. For it is possible, as I said, to step aside. Without suspicion. Without hatred.
21If anyone can prove me wrong and show me that my thinking or actions are mistaken, I will gladly change. For I seek the truth. No one has ever been harmed by the truth. But those who persist in their own self-deception and ignorance are harmed.
22I do my own duty. Nothing else distracts me. For other things are either lifeless or mindless. Or they are lost and do not know the way.
23Treat animals and material things with a generous and noble spirit. They lack reason, but you possess it. Treat human beings with a spirit of fellowship. They share reason with you. In all things, call upon the gods. Do not worry about how long you will live this way. Even three hours lived like this would be enough.
24Alexander the Great and his mule driver arrived at the same place when they died. Either they were absorbed back into the same generative principles of the universe. Or they were scattered alike into atoms.
25Consider how many things occur simultaneously within each of us in a single instant. Both physical and mental. And you will not be surprised that far more things happen at once in the One and All that we call the universe. Indeed, everything does.
26If someone asks you to spell the name Antoninus, would you shout each letter at them? What if they get angry? Would you get angry back? No. You would calmly continue through each letter one by one. Remember this here as well. Every duty is completed through a series of steps. You must keep count of these steps. Stay calm. Do not return hostility to those who oppose you. Complete what lies before you. Stay the course.
27How cruel it is to forbid people from pursuing what seems good and beneficial to them. Yet in a way, you do exactly this when you become angry at their mistakes. For they are simply moving toward what appears good and beneficial to them. "But they are wrong!" Then teach them. Show them. Without anger.
28Death is rest from the resistance of the senses. Rest from the jerking of impulse like a puppet on strings. Rest from the wandering of thought. Rest from service to the flesh.
29It is shameful when the soul gives up before the body does, in a life where the body has not yet failed you.
30Be careful not to become Caesarified. Do not be dyed by the purple. It happens. Keep yourself simple. Keep yourself good. Keep yourself uncorrupted. Keep yourself dignified. Keep yourself unaffected. Be a friend of justice. Revere the gods. Show goodwill to others. Love deeply. Stay strong for the work that is fitting. Fight to remain the person philosophy wanted to make you. Honor the gods. Protect human beings. Life is brief. The one harvest of earthly existence is a holy disposition and actions that serve the common good. In all things be a student of Antoninus. Remember his energy in pursuing what reason demanded. His evenness in every circumstance. His reverence. The calm of his face. His gentleness. His freedom from vanity. His drive to truly grasp matters at hand. Remember how he would never dismiss anything without first examining it thoroughly and understanding it clearly. How he endured those who blamed him unjustly without blaming them in return. How he never rushed. How he refused to entertain slander. How he was a careful judge of character and conduct. Yet never insulting. Never startled by noise. Never suspicious. Never a sophist. How he was content with little. A modest home. A simple bed. Plain clothing. Basic food. Few attendants. Remember his capacity for hard work. His patience. How he could remain in the same place until evening. How his spare diet meant he did not even need to relieve himself outside his usual hour. How steady and constant he was in friendship. How he tolerated those who openly opposed his views. How he welcomed anyone who showed him something better. How he honored the gods without superstition. May your final hour come to you with a conscience as clear as his.
31Wake up and come back to yourself. Once you've shaken off sleep and realized that dreams were troubling you, look at these things with waking eyes. See them as clearly as you saw those dreams.
32I am made of a body and a soul. To the body, all things are indifferent. It cannot make distinctions. To the mind, all things are indifferent except its own activities. And all its activities are within its power. Even then, it concerns itself only with the present. Its future and past activities are already indifferent.
33Hardship is not unnatural for the hand or the foot. Not as long as they do what hands and feet are made to do. In the same way, hardship is not unnatural for a human being. Not as long as we do what human beings are made to do. And if it is not unnatural, it is not evil.
34Think of the pleasures enjoyed by robbers, perverts, those who murder their fathers, and tyrants.
35Don't you see how common craftsmen accommodate ordinary people up to a point? Yet they hold fast to the principles of their craft. They refuse to abandon them. Isn't it shameful if the architect and the physician will respect the principles of their own craft more than a human being respects his own reason? That reason he shares with the gods.
36Asia and Europe are mere corners of the cosmos. Every ocean is a drop within the cosmos. Mount Athos is a clod of dirt within the cosmos. The entire present moment is a single point in eternity. Everything is small. Everything shifts easily. Everything vanishes. All things come from one source. They spring from that universal governing mind. Or they follow as consequences. The lion's gaping jaws. Deadly poison. Every form of harm. These are like thorns. Like mud. They are byproducts of what is noble and beautiful. So do not imagine these things are alien to what you revere. Instead, reflect on the source of all things.
37Whoever has seen the present has seen everything. All that has come to pass from eternity. All that will unfold into infinity. For all things are of one kind and one form.
38Often reflect on how all things in the universe are bound together. How they relate to one another. In a sense, everything is interwoven with everything else. And because of this, all things share a kind of kinship. One thing follows another in sequence through the tension that moves through them. Through their shared breath. Through the unity of all substance.
39Fit yourself to the circumstances you've been given. Love the people you've been placed among. And mean it.
40Every tool and instrument and piece of equipment serves its purpose well when it does what it was made to do. Yet in those cases the maker stands apart from it. But in things held together by nature, the power that made them remains within. It stays present. This is why you must honor it all the more. And know this: if you live according to its will, everything you have moves in harmony with mind. So too does the universe hold all that belongs to it in harmony with mind.
41When you treat anything outside your control as good or bad, you are bound to blame the gods when misfortune strikes. You are bound to hate the people you suspect of causing your loss or suffering. We commit countless wrongs because we care so deeply about these things. But if you judge only what is within your power to be good or bad, no reason remains to accuse the gods. No reason remains to stand against any person as an enemy.
42We all work together toward one outcome. Some do so knowingly and with awareness. Others do so without understanding. Heraclitus, I believe, says that even those who sleep are workers and collaborators in what happens in the universe. Each person contributes in a different way. And in abundance, so does the one who complains. So does the one who tries to resist and undo what happens. The universe needed even such a person. So then, understand where you place yourself among them. The one who governs all things will certainly make good use of you. He will accept you as one part among the workers and collaborators. But do not become the kind of part that is like the cheap and ridiculous verse in a play. Chrysippus mentions this.
43Does the sun try to do the work of the rain? Does the god of healing try to do the work of the harvest goddess? And what of each star? They differ from one another. Yet all work together toward the same end.
44If the gods have deliberated about me and what must happen to me, they have deliberated well. It is hard even to imagine a god without wisdom. And why would they be moved to harm me? What would they or the universe they care for most have gained from that? But if they have not deliberated about me specifically, they have certainly deliberated about the whole. And I must welcome and embrace what follows from that as a consequence. But suppose they deliberate about nothing at all. This is impious to believe. Otherwise let us stop sacrificing. Let us stop praying. Let us stop swearing oaths. Let us stop doing all those things we do daily as though the gods were present and living among us. But even if they deliberate about nothing that concerns us, I am still free to deliberate about myself. I can still consider what benefits me. And what benefits each person is what accords with their own constitution and nature. My nature is rational and social. As Antoninus, my city and fatherland is Rome. As a human being, it is the universe. Only what benefits these two cities is good for me.
45Whatever happens to each person benefits the whole. That should be enough. But watch closely and you will see something more. What happens to one person also happens to others. Here let "benefit" be understood in its ordinary sense. As applying to things neither good nor bad.
46You know how the spectacles in the amphitheater grow stale. You see the same things over and over. The sameness makes the show unbearable. This is what happens across all of life. Everything cycles up and down. The same events from the same causes. How long will you endure it?
47Think constantly about people of every kind who have died. People of every profession. People of every nation. Follow this chain all the way down to Philistion, Phoibus, and Origanion. Now turn to the other ranks of the dead. We must pass over to where so many brilliant orators have gone. So many revered philosophers: Heraclitus, Pythagoras, Socrates. So many heroes of earlier times. So many generals and tyrants who came later. And beyond these: Eudoxus, Hipparchus, Archimedes. Other sharp minds. The great-souled. The hardworking. The cunning. The stubborn. Even those who mocked the brief and fleeting life of mortals. Men like Menippus and all his kind. Consider this about every one of them: they have long been in the ground. What harm has this done them? And what of those whose names are not remembered at all? One thing here is worth a great deal. To live with truth and justice. To show goodwill even toward liars and the unjust.
48When you want to lift your spirits, think of the strengths of those around you. One person's energy. Another's humility. Another's generosity. Each has something. Nothing brings more joy than seeing the reflections of virtue in the character of those we live with. Especially when many appear together at once. Keep these qualities ready in your mind.
49Are you upset that you weigh a certain number of pounds and not three hundred? Then why be upset that you will live a certain number of years and not more? Just as you accept whatever portion of matter has been assigned to you, accept the same for time.
50Try to persuade them. But act even against their will when justice demands it. If someone blocks you with force, shift to acceptance and peace of mind. Use the obstacle to practice another virtue. Remember that you began with reservations. You were not reaching for the impossible. What then were you reaching for? An impulse of this very kind. And that you have achieved. What we set out to do is done.
51The glory-seeker treats another person's action as his own good. The pleasure-seeker treats his own feeling as his good. The person with understanding treats his own action as his good.
52You can choose to form no judgment about this. You can refuse to let it disturb your soul. Things themselves have no power to create our judgments.
53Train yourself to give your complete attention when another person speaks. Enter into the mind of the speaker as fully as you can.
54What harms the hive harms the bee.
55If sailors criticized my steering or patients my treatment, would I listen to anyone else? Or would I focus on how I myself might bring safety to those aboard and health to those in my care?
56So many who entered this world alongside me have already departed.
57To those with jaundice, honey tastes bitter. To those bitten by a rabid dog, water is terrifying. To children, a ball is beautiful. Why then do I grow angry? Do you think a false belief has less power than bile has over the jaundiced? Or less than venom has over one bitten by a rabid dog?
58No one can stop you from living according to your own nature. Nothing will happen to you that goes against universal nature.
59People become like those they try to please. They become like the things they chase. They become like the work they do. Time will soon bury everything. Think of how much it has buried already.