ARKCODEX
Act III, Scene 5
1The same. A garden.
2Enter Launcelot and Jessica.
3LauncelotYes, truly; for, look you, the sins of the father are to be laid upon the children: therefore, I promise ye, I fear you. I was always plain with you, and so now I speak my agitation of the matter: therefore be of good cheer, for truly I think you are damned. There is but one hope in it that can do you any good; and that is but a kind of bastard hope neither.
4JessicaAnd what hope is that, I pray thee?
5LauncelotMarry, you may partly hope that your father got you not, that you are not the Jew’s daughter.
6JessicaThat were a kind of bastard hope, indeed: so the sins of my mother should be visited upon me.
7LauncelotTruly then I fear you are damned both by father and mother: thus when I shun Scylla, your father, I fall into Charybdis, your mother: well, you are gone both ways.
8JessicaI shall be saved by my husband; he hath made me a Christian.
9LauncelotTruly, the more to blame he: we were Christians enow before; e’en as many as could well live, one by another. This making Christians will raise the price of hogs: if we grow all to be pork-eaters, we shall not shortly have a rasher on the coals for money.
10Enter Lorenzo.
11JessicaI’ll tell my husband, Launcelot, what you say: here he comes.
12LorenzoI shall grow jealous of you shortly, Launcelot, if you thus get my wife into corners.
13JessicaNay, you need not fear us, Lorenzo: Launcelot and I are out. He tells me flatly, there is no mercy for me in heaven, because I am a Jew’s daughter: and he says, you are no good member of the commonwealth, for in converting Jews to Christians, you raise the price of pork.
14LorenzoI shall answer that better to the commonwealth than you can the getting up of the negro’s belly: the Moor is with child by you, Launcelot.
15LauncelotIt is much that the Moor should be more than reason: but if she be less than an honest woman, she is indeed more than I took her for.
16LorenzoHow every fool can play upon the word! I think the best grace of wit will shortly turn into silence, and discourse grow commendable in none only but parrots. Go in, sirrah; bid them prepare for dinner.
17LauncelotThat is done, sir; they have all stomachs.
18LorenzoGoodly Lord, what a wit-snapper are you! then bid them prepare dinner.
19LauncelotThat is done too, sir; only “cover” is the word.
20LorenzoWill you cover then, sir?
21LauncelotNot so, sir, neither; I know my duty.
22LorenzoYet more quarrelling with occasion! Wilt thou show the whole wealth of thy wit in an instant? I pray tree, understand a plain man in his plain meaning: go to thy fellows; bid them cover the table, serve in the meat, and we will come in to dinner.
23LauncelotFor the table, sir, it shall be served in; for the meat, sir, it shall be covered; for your coming in to dinner, sir, why, let it be as humours and conceits shall govern. Exit.
24LorenzoO dear discretion, how his words are suited!
The fool hath planted in his memory
An army of good words; and I do know
A many fools, that stand in better place,
Garnish’d like him, that for a tricksy word
Defy the matter. How cheerest thou, Jessica?
And now, good sweet, say thy opinion,
How dost thou like the Lord Bassanio’s wife?
25JessicaPast all expressing. It is very meet
The Lord Bassanio live an upright life;
For, having such a blessing in his lady,
He finds the joys of heaven here on earth;
And if on earth he do not mean it, then
In reason he should never come to heaven
Why, if two gods should play some heavenly match
And on the wager lay two earthly women,
And Portia one, there must be something else
Pawn’d with the other, for the poor rude world
Hath not her fellow.
26LorenzoEven such a husband
Hast thou of me as she is for a wife.
27JessicaNay, but ask my opinion too of that.
28LorenzoI will anon: first, let us go to dinner.
29JessicaNay, let me praise you while I have a stomach.
30LorenzoNo, pray thee, let it serve for table-talk;
Then, howso’er thou speak’st, ’mong other things
I shall digest it.
31JessicaWell, I’ll set you forth. Exeunt.